Lunch with Aamir Khan at Sundance

My Date With Aamir Khan
(ahem...our date, na?)

Okay, if you want to be picky about it...

Our Date With Aamir Khan
(but it doesn't have the same ring to it)

Take a small group of, say 4 or 5, completely diverse people from across America. People who would never otherwise form a group or mingle socially. Throw them together with one dynamic personality admired by all of them and what do you get? A new family. Bound together by a unique event that may never again come to pass for them. But this same event will bind this small group in a way that even family cannot break, bend, nor join. A unique fraternity. This is their small but unforgettable tale.

Dateline: Park City, Utah; Hotel Park City, Sundance Film Festival
January 30, 2010

I am the first to arrive, as usual 20 minutes early. I am greeted by the friendly hotel staff and told to make myself at home. I proceeded to the nicely appointed lobby with it's roaring fireplace, plush seating and grand piano. A stupendous view of the ski slopes shows through floor-to-ceiling windows at the far end of the room.

It is not long before Katherine arrives. She is carrying a vase of roses. As she takes a seat near me, she informs me that today is Tiffany's 25th birthday. “What a great gift she is getting for her day!” I think to myself. I haven't even met Tiffany yet this bonds us together. My birthday having only been 19 days ago, I consider this day a belated birthday gift as well. As I found out later, this was an early birthday gift for Praveer, who's birthday is in three weeks.

Katherine and I, having only spoken over the phone to coordinate this meeting, make small talk by way of introduction until Tiffany and her guest, Megan, arrive and join us. We spend about ten minutes chatting. Then things start to happen.

Binky, Aamir's manager, approaches. She introduces herself to each of us and asks if we are all here. “No, Praveer should be here soon.” No sooner does someone call his cell, then in the door he comes. He is carrying a plastic bag with a birthday cake for Tiffany. Praveer hardly has time to draw breath, when there is a sudden flurry of activity. Three bodyguards appear on the heels of a dynamo.

I look up and there he is, Aamir Khan, looking smart in white pant and apricot sweater. He shakes our hands one by one and suddenly all the nervousness I've been carrying since this meeting was arranged, all the sleepless nights worrying about how to act or what to say, are gone. There is something so normal, so average, so “regular guy” about Aamir that one is instantly put at ease. It is clear from the moment he appears that he is master of his universe and all is well in it.

A word of advice. If you don't have quick reflexes, be prepared to get left behind. No sooner are the introductions completed, then we are wisked off to a small sandwich shop in the hotel and seated around a prearranged table with exactly the number of chairs needed. I have to admire the efficiency of his staff. Another thing I notice is that as soon as we are seated, the bodyguards fade into the background. If you look for them, there they are. But never obvious or intrusive and always with a gentle smile and a nod, if you catch their eye.

Aamir sits at one end of the table, back to a wall. The rest arrange ourselves and settle in. There is a bubble that seems to descend over our table. The world no longer exists. We are here, Aamir is with us and the rest is forgotten.

Katherine presents him with a t-shirt from Georgia Tech. Tiffany gives him a cowboy hat from Texas and I give him an “Oklahoma Dirt Shirt”, dyed with the rusty dirt of my home state. I also give him a package of messages from friends I've made in his chat room and blog, and other things. He takes the time to look at each one and listen to the explanation of what it is, then sets it aside with a promise to look more closely later.

Now everyone has experienced the awkward silence at the beginning of any such gathering. That moment when no one knows how to start the ball rolling. I can tell you, this did not happen. Aamir was always aware of each of us. Always prepared with a question, fixing us with his bright, intense and intelligent gaze, he asked his question. Addressing you by name he asks “What do you do” and without wavering, actively listens while you answer. You can see that he is not forming his next question, thinking about what is on the menu, or worried about the time. He is there, for you, until you are satisfied to release that gaze, happy in the knowledge that he actually heard what you said.

His face is animated. You can see the impact of your words on him. He hides nothing. To make him genuinely laugh or gasp with surprise is a treat. A small gift between friends. And friend is what he is. Even if you never see him again, you know, for this moment in time, he is your friend.
He has put his cell on silent mode, as have we all. But occasionally he will answer it. Conducting this bit of business or that, arranging something for later with his wife, answering some necessary question. He does not linger on the phone. His time is ours and he will not waste it.
We are so engaged in conversation that the menus sit idle on the table in front of us, forgotten. The first round of beverages half gone before we remember we were supposed to be eating. I know, you want to know what he had – to be honest all I remember was the Diet Coke he drank. Don't ask me what he ate, I was so enchanted by the conversation I don't even remember what I ate.

We discuss books. I must remember to check out Harry Crews. Aamir tells us how he sought out the author in Florida many years ago when he was in the states and about his unique stories. Other authors are discussed as well. Dostoevsky, Tolstoy, etc.

Then a tension filled moment when Aamir asked the group as a whole “What do you think of Obama?” Knowing full well that we were not going to agree, we exchanged glances nervously. Everybody knows that the two subjects forbidden in the polite company of strangers are religion and politics. But we couldn't exactly refuse the topic. So what followed was a gentle disagreement of opinions. I, for one, was glad when the topic was dropped and we moved on to another. Don't ask me what opinions were voiced by whom. I don't feel it is my place to tell you these things nor to editorialize on said opinions. Let's just say we all know where we stand and let it go at that. Hmmm?

We discussed the state of health care in America, Praveer and I taking two sides in a heated discussion about medical treatments and the lack of understanding of homeopathy and a strong disagreement on whether said natural remedies actually work. Praveer is a doctor, you see, and I was raised to believe in natural healing and have seen it work in cases that were given up by the medicos. I believe Praveer and I are still friends. Haha. I would tentatively assert here that Aamir was on my side of that discussion and agreed that homeopathic treatments do have their place in the treatment of ailments.

Education was covered as well. With Tiffany telling us about her studies that have lead her to China and her desire to return there soon. Aamir was very interested in the Chinese and asked many questions.

Somewhere in the middle of this, the waitress brough Tiffany's cake, candles alight and set it in front of her. She made her wish, blew out the candle and Aamir, solo, sang Happy Birthday to her. It was a touching moment and I wish I had it on video.

Well, we eventually decided we better make a move. The little shop had been closed for some time now. Aamir called for the bill and without a word paid for the entire meal.

We then went outside where a photo op was arranged. Now I will say, for all the teasing of my friends about my height, that Aamir never even batted an eyelash. He put his arm around me like we had know each other for years and stood there for several shots taken on my camera by one of his bodyguards.

We then returned to the lobby, where Aamir commandeered the chess set, took it to the window seat where Praveer and he sat down to an eagerly awaited (well, on Aamir's part anyway) game. Praveer was already convinced he would lose in ten minutes, but held his own quite well for more than an hour.

Before the match began though, everyone brought out dvd covers etc. and Aamir autographed each and every one.

Tiffany and Megan took their leave to return to Provo and Katherine and I settled in to watch the match. Occasionally, we would make some remark to Aamir and he would break his concentration to answer. For the most part we just chatted amiably and using three cameras filmed the game. My camera ran out of memory so I did not get the “fatal move” by Praveer, nor the final outcome of the match. Aamir won. Any doubt? But I am hoping Praveer will remember to send me his file so I can put that together and post it online (editing out the unexciting bits of course.)

This lunch meeting was scheduled to happen from 2PM to 5PM. It was 6PM before he left us. Hugging each of us in turn, he rushed off in a flurry of activity, literally running for the elevator to not be late for the Awards Ceremony. But he still took the time to promise to try to get us all tickets to get into the awards.

And he came through! No sooner did I return to my hotel when I received a call saying come to the Racquet Club Theatre. Vijay, the bodyguard, was waiting outside for me with my ticket! I was impressed. It would have been so easy to say he would try to get us in and then go off and do his thing. But no! Aamir is true to his word. Even in the rush to get ready, which by the way gave him no chance to change his clothes, he did what he said he would do.

Aamir Khan is an intelligent, gentle, kind, thoughtful and incredibly dynamic soul. He is everything he appears to be and more. I was left, at the end of this incredible day, with only one impression. So overwhelmed by the whirl of events. So stunned by his perfect humanity and attentiveness. I could only say “He is just...awesome. Awesome.” As the days pass from here, I'm sure, in moments when I am not thinking of anything, a scene from this day will play through my head and details I forgot to write here will come back to me. These thoughts, I know, will bring with them that same warm feeling and sweet smile that they gave me that day.

Thank you Aamir, for one of the best days of my life. You are just....Awesome.